It had never really occurred to me that I had to return to my place.
Or rather, I didn’t realize the gravity of what it would mean to me, staying over at his place like this.
If I had been looking in from the outside of my life, I would say that we were moving too fast. Or I was moving too fast.
But being inside of this, it all seemed different and natural to be in his company every moment that I could spare it.
Now, we lounged in the sofa, watching the news after our respective showers. The scent of the marinade he’d made for the steaks he intended to grill tomorrow was thick in the air and every so often, I inhaled it deep.
I couldn’t wait to taste it.
That was what had triggered the realization.
It was particularly hot this night and he loaned me a pair of boxers which I wore over the briefs that had become mine. The boxers fit loosely even though they were his smallest pair, such that I had to tug them up on occasion when they began to slip from my hips. The t-shirt was oversized and all but covered the boxers altogether.
He liked my legs, he’d said.
I’d burst out laughing.
Now, he lay with his head in my lap, his legs thrown one in front of him and the other tucked over the backrest. Occasionally, I’d find my hand in his, idly twining our fingers.
I liked this.
“There’s barely anything good in the world these days…” I said quietly.
“It’s just not news worthy, the good stuff,” he’d said quietly.
I guess I got that.
“And those missing girls,” I said. “Do you think they’re alive?”
He looked away from the TV, gazing up at the ceiling.
“I try not to think about it.”
“I can’t imagine… If that was my daughter or my sister…”
His eyes wandered to mine then. “You don’t say much about your sister.”
He was right. He knew my dad was a Doctor and that my mother was a Nurse, but I hadn’t really said much about my sister.
“I don’t like to talk about it…” I said honestly.
“Okay,” he said quietly.
We both looked back at the TV screen.
Bombs going off, drone strikes on villages, lots of people dead.
He shifted wear he lay, very slightly.
His grip faltered in my hand and that brought my attention back to him.
It was strange, how the body worked.
I momentarily forgot my woes and was instead distracted by how beautiful he was.
All of his focus was on the current news report and he seemed to be listening so intently that I wondered how it would feel to have all of his attention on me like that.
And I was instantly aroused.
“I’m gonna get some water,” I said. “You want anything?”
He skewed his face as he sat up to allow me to stand up.
I stood by the sofa while he thought it over.
Had I disturbed him?
His eyes lifted to mine then and I was hit with the full blast of their intensity.
I felt that right between my thighs.
He placed his hands on my hips, pulling me closer so that I was made to stand before him. He locked his knees around my legs, my own knees pressed up against the sofa itself.
“I am thirsty…” he said. “But… For you…”
He lowered his head and pressed a kiss to my abdomen through my shirt.
My breathing had already picked up.
I didn’t want to stop him, whatever he was going to do.
He looked back up at me as he tugged on the hems of the boxers. They slipped easily off my hips and pooled where his knees blocked their path.
After a moment, having gauged my reaction, he loosened the grip of his legs and the boxers whispered to the carpeted floor at my feet.
He lifted the shirt, hiking it up my thighs. And then he dropped gentle, soft kisses along the sensitive skin there.
I whimpered, my whole body clenched tight and loosening all at once.
He scooted forward, right to the edge, my legs almost touching his crotch.
He tucked his arms around my legs, his forearms just below my bottom – and then he leaned backward, taking me with him.
I gripped the backrest of the sofa for stability, finding my knees resting right in his lap and I feared I was hurting him; crushing him.
I gazed down at him in fascination, wondering what he would do next.
He spread his thighs, placing my knees on them, just as wide.
His face was just about level with my crotch.
I swallowed hard.
What was he going to do?
I was sure, I knew.
He brought his hands to the waistband of the briefs and tilted his head back so that he was looking up at me. When I didn’t react; when I simply waited and watched, he pulled the briefs down, stopping only when they reached my knees.
Somewhere in my mind, I marvelled at how they could stretch that far.
I held my breath, realizing that I was laid bare to him, even though I could not see it myself. He dropped his head again and all I could see was the black hair atop his head and nothing else.
I was caught off guard by the sudden contact when he brushed the knuckles of his fingers over my sex. I threw my head back, groaning deep in my chest, loud.
“You’re so wet…”
I swallowed hard, trembling where he brushed these same knuckles against the inside of my right thigh. I could feel the evidence of his exploration of me on my skin, first warm and then cold as air passed over the moisture – he was blowing on my skin.
A bead of sweat slithered down my chest and I shivered.
I was so hot, my skin ablaze.
And then his palms covered both my buttocks.
I knew what was coming, but I was not prepared for any of it.
I cried out when he pressed me right into him, his mouth on my most feminine core. His tongue lapped back and forth and swirled over my clit in dizzying circles.
I could hear my own voice, feel myself rocking back and forth against the insistent pressure of his tongue.
He groaned deep in his chest as he squeezed my ass, pushing me even harder against his mouth.
I gripped the backrest with one hand, the other balled into a fist at the nape of his neck.
I felt the heat on me like flames against my very flesh. My clit sizzled between my legs and it almost hurt as the pressure began to build and build.
“Dominick..!” I whimpered, my legs beginning to twitch and tremble.
I didn’t know what to do with myself!
I wanted to sit and stand and scream and dance.
He held me securely against him as the tremors started, right there between my thighs, a warning of a much more thunderous explosion on the horizon –
He let go of me altogether and I dropped into his lap as he sat forward.
He slid back on the sofa, taking me with him.
He pushed my knees gently off his legs, spreading my thighs so I straddled him.
He kissed me then, his tongue invading my mouth.
He tasted – tangy and salty and sweet at the same time.
I had barely registered the fact that I was tasting myself when the steady rhythm of gentle friction started up between my thighs. He started slow and then picked up his tempo, building the tremors inside me again.
I broke the kiss, craving breath.
I found myself leaning back, gripping his thighs for balance, riding his fingers as they seduced my clit. He gripped my hip with his other hand, slowing my rhythm to a complete stop, but his hand continued to move.
It was like being thrown head first down an endless pit of colours, like spiralling through a kaleidoscope with nothing to hold on to.
I cried out, rising clear off of him onto my knees.
He took complete advantage of this, ducking down to lick me again, stretching the orgasm on and on and on.
I vibrated in his mouth, trying to lock my legs around his face, but I was held firm by his expert hands.
It was like a prayer – an exaltation of all my joy.
And I exploded all at once, feeling like I had risen right out of my whole body, out of this moment, beyond my own existence.
When I opened my eyes, it was dark and for a moment, I wondered if there was something covering my eyes. I was disoriented and spatially aware of things that I knew I wasn’t used to having around me.
Like this bed.
And the arm draped over my waist and the legs that were tangled with mine.
He lay before me, his breathing deep and even as he slept.
All that had happened crashed into my mind like shattered glass and I gasped in shock at what I’d done.
For a second, I panicked.
The questions and the shame flew right at me with unrelenting force and I held my breath, thinking about God and Hell and my vow.
But then it stopped.
All of it, just stopped.
The raging storm of my silent panic just fell back all at once when my eyes locked on his face, my own breathing settling into the rhythm of his.
The truth was glorious and frightening.
I love him.
My breath came out slow at the revelation.
If the fates saw fit to punish me in this life, for this, then so be it…